This yellow leaf floated down from the sky before my eyes. It came to rest, pierced by the thin branchlet of another tree and hung like an ornament over the path. I love seeing wonders like this unfold. Who would think that a leaf from one tree would end up in the embrace of another?

Who would think that the Creator of our universe would see me falling and reach out His hand to save me? Yes, there have certainly been times when I’ve fallen flat but He caught me then, too.

One winter I slipped on ice and violently fell to the concrete, hitting my face on a metal edge on the way down. I needed stitches and had a concussion that left me terribly sensitive to light and sound. A year after the fall I complained to my doctor that I was still having bad affects so she sent me for testing. The test didn’t find any sign of my fall but it did discover two brain aneurysms. I ended up in Johns Hopkins aneurysm center, one of the top in the nation, and had an incredible experience as they fixed the arteries in my brain over the course of six months.

It is so important that I trust God and stay in faith with Him every step.  It is important that I do not draw conclusions about my situation too quickly, but stay in faith with God until He shows me His plan.  I had a bad fall but He caught me just the same.

Though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the lord upholds him with His hand. Psalm 37:24

When I was young I had three goals. I wanted to climb Mt. Everest, run in the Olympics and become a writer, all equally lofty in my opinion. I believe God has put in me the desire to do great things and I think that I can apply that desire to anything I choose. I released the climbing and the running, and drew close to God to pursue the work of my soul.

In his beautiful book, The Book of Awakening, Mark Nepo tells of two monkeys asleep in the zoo, their fingers touching allowing them to doze in their oneness, perfectly at peace.  I want to spend my waking and sleeping moments with my fingertips touching God’s.

God made me to connect.  I have experienced exhilaration, like anything is possible, beside another person.  Imagine touching God each moment, connecting to His force of love and grace.  How precious, full and golden life is in His presence.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Ephesians 6:10

Why pray if God is omniscient? Why tell Him things He already knows? Why ask Him for needs He can clearly see? When I pray most times the answer is not dropped down to me like a feather from an angel.  Why pray?

Always I come back to the truth of who I am.  I am God’s child.  I need to be reconciled to Him–once and continually.  For every moment, for everything, for evermore.

Prayer is the way I stay near to my Father and include Him in my life. It is how I stay in His presence for guidance and comfort. It is how I express my despair and yearnings and hope for the peace only He brings.  As I grow in Him, prayer becomes less about asking and more about aligning with the One who wants to be my everything.

I cherish this place with God and already love the place He’s taking me. I like the simplicity of worship, praise, acknowledging Him, and living with collected expectation of what He will bring into my life.

How great is the love the Father Has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1

I took a class in oil painting once. I signed up for an adult session because I was in the city for my son’s art class and had nothing else to do.  Art had always enchanted and intimidated me.

In the first lesson, we were told to draw the still life before us with a permanent black marker. I was stunned and horrified. How could I erase all of my mistakes? I was sure to make many of them and would need to hide them immediately!

My teacher just smiled. She didn’t entertain my fears for a moment. The next week I was standing before an easel and canvas dabbing colored oils into shapes like radishes. Each time I called to my teacher for help, she whispered over my shoulder, “You’re doing fine.” I decided to allow myself to enjoy and trust the process. Soon my fears melted away and in their place was love and pleasure.

I cherished my moments in that attic above the city. Each week I’d run up to the room like a parent returning to her baby, find my canvas, situate my easel and tools and settle in to an hour of nursing and cooing at my creation. At the end of the year I won the award for the best beginner and was delighted with my work and my victory over fear and negativity.  When I approach my life with love I will create a masterpiece.

And above all these, put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. Colossians 3:14

I haven’t done anything to deserve God’s best. God is good.  Grace and goodness flow from Him.  He provides for me His grace and blessings because of the work Jesus did for me on the cross. He died for my sins and I am living a new life because of Him.

When I pray for a need, a healing, or God’s touch, I do it in the name of Jesus Christ, my savior.  Because of His sacrifice for me, God sees Him in me, no longer my sin and separation.  I remember the words of the Bible that tell me that as Jesus is, so are we in this world. (1 John 4:17). I remember that through Christ I am a beloved child of God and my Father wants me to have life abundant. I have faith that God will bring me to healing according to the plans He has for me.

Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise His holy name. Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all His benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from he pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagles. Psalm 103:1-5

One day years ago I dressed in my new leather mules and favorite jeans and went out to run some errands. I remember stepping out of a little store in town feeling like I was looking real good. Right outside the door, I slid on a few wet leaves and fell down on my hands and knees, tearing my jeans and bruising my ego.

Once on the last swim of a vacation, with not a care in the world, I got caught in a current and almost drown. There were troubling signs in the sea that I ignored. My husband heeded them and got out with our son.     I stayed in, wanting more fun, but found terror.

My point isn’t that something bad might happen if I let my guard down, though that may be true. The important thing is that I can be with the God of the Universe at all times. I can hear His voice and feel His majestic presence. With Him I will always have enough attention, enough joy.  God always has something good to bring to me to satisfy my desires in the highest way. His way, by His hand. No pair of mules or deflated raft can take me where He wants to lead me.  God’s companionship brings ample peace and joy to both the dark and light times.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39

My walks in this park used to be very different. Instead of honoring the moments for growth and refreshment, I was often absorbed with thoughts of others. I put on earbuds to negate interaction with others. I dressed in a way to fit in and look pleasing to others. I might secretly roll my eyes when another walker didn’t respond to my friendly smile. And I competed with everyone on the path. Yes, if there was a person anywhere in front of me, I set my sights on him and charged forward, closing the gap until I finally passed him. I never thought of it as “competing” but making goals and challenging myself.

When I turn my mind to God, preoccupations with others disappear. I strive for the goals and challenges He has for me and release false connections to others. I cannot compare with another creation of God, we are each unique. I need not compete to climb higher but aspire to climb to the heights God sets for me.

Each of you must examine your own actions. Then you can be proud of your own accomplishments without comparing yourself to others. Assume your own responsibility. Galatians 6:4-5

As a child, I loved going to our family farm in the summers. After school was out, I’d throw my flip flops and shorts into the station wagon and we’d drive away into sweet summer freedom and fun. Simple!

Well, actually my parents first had to wrap up their teaching classrooms. Then they would prepare our home to be closed up while we were gone. And the farmhouse, for our arrival. And then there was the matter of transporting all of our animals—chickens, ducks, rabbits and a goat or two from our boarder’s farm to our farm. And buy all the feed and hay. Not to mention packing all of our necessities and belongings—even my mother’s piano—into our vehicles. My parents were working hard behind the scenes to create a wonderful summer experience for me and my sister and I had no idea or care in the world.

When I wonder what God is doing in my situation, I try to remember all of the things my parents were doing to provide a wonderful life for me when I was young. As a small child, I couldn’t conceive of the work, time, planning, coordinating and balancing it took to provide good things for me. I love returning to the trust of a child and letting my Father move beautifully in my life.

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

When the Egyptians were closing in and the Israelites were losing hope (Exodus 14), Moses told them, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Imagine if the Israelites ignored Moses and tried to fight the Egyptians themselves. Imagine if they ran into the sea for refuge without God parting the water. There are times in my life when I must allow God to do the work. It may be more than I could handle alone and it may be that God wants to shine in the situation Himself.

When I am still and silent in faith and humility, God can step in and be my defender and all the glory is His.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will act. He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Psalm 37:5-6

I collect heart rocks. I have hundreds of them, all shapes, sizes and composition. I’ve surrounded myself with stony unbreakable hearts while my human one breaks so easily. I am beginning to think that God made it that way.

A cast for a broken arm, glue for a broken dish, a spring for a broken watch but what for a broken heart? No earthly thing. God made my heart deeply special and extraordinarily specific to me. My heart is attuned to only God and the spirit He made me to be. He alone knows the frequency at which He resounds in my heart and the code to open it for repairs.

That’s why, I believe, a heart is a lonely and bewildered thing without God. A hurting heart is a heart losing hope, one which longs for something to sweep in and change everything, to turn things right side up again.

God ultimately does. I turn to Him and tell Him my truth and He brings—or perhaps His angels do—the thing my heart needs, at the perfect time, in the perfect way. He delivers it to me, the perfect healing. I continue in faith, knowing that though I have seen loss, God loves me so much. He knows the disharmony in my spirit and comes to bring my heart back into resonance with Him and the life He gives me to live.

He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3