What would life be without knowing the Almighty God, Jesus my Savior and the Holy Spirit who dwells and moves within me? What ultimate meaning would it hold? What sacred purpose could be reached? I have lived seasons in that obscurity and returned to truth, God stirring and calling within me.

The weeds in my garden are knee high today, the morning glories are strangling the sunflowers. There are horrific stories in the news. My sugar addiction is flaring, my son is in pain, two friends lie in the hospital. Our bedroom is waiting empty to be painted, the bathroom gutted for years. What will I make for dinner? Did the postman deliver my flip flops?

A highly abbreviated list, these are the circumstances of my day, the matters of my mind. These elements of life swell quickly into waves that crash against my legs, and push me further away from the quiet world from which they rise. In that place there is clarity and peace, leagues and leagues deep. It is where God stirs in me, prompting me to mind His ways, serve His plan, align with His order. He works in me there and breathes in me calmness and purpose.

I stop to listen, receive and fill with Him instead.  With Him in me, I can welcome the waves and serenely find my place in them.

The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life.  Job 33:4

Why am I repeatedly astonished at the way God works? I have a problem, I pray to Him, I give it to Him, I wait for Him, and He does something amazing. And I am surprised? Why would I be surprised at the miraculous ways God works? I should anticipate it with joy and thanksgiving!

There is a story in Acts about Peter, a disciple who had been sharing the good news of the Lord Jesus Christ. He was thrown in prison by Herod, King of the Jews and aggressor toward those of the church. When they heard that he had been imprisoned, people of the church gathered to pray for Peter, who sat waiting for trial guarded by 16 soldiers.

The night before his trial, an angel of the Lord came to free Peter, chained and sleeping between two guards. He walked out of the prison with the angel, past the many guards, and went to the home where the people were still praying for his release. When he knocked, a young servant girl recognized him and told the others that Peter was at the door. None of them believed her, they told her she was out of her mind. Peter was knocking as they sat praying for his release and when they saw him with their own eyes, they were astonished.

I want to pray brimming with awe and anticipation of my amazing God. He answers me with great and awesome things.

 

Now Peter continued knocking; and when they opened the door and saw him, they were astonished. But motioning to them with his hand to keep silent, he declared to them how the Lord had brought him out of the prison.  Acts 13:16-17

I was home alone at night, 12 years old, when King came to my rescue again. There was a knock at the back door and I went to the dining room window to peer out. A young man stood on the porch and he asked me if he could come in and use the phone. I told him that I was alone and didn’t think I should let him in. He kept asking, trying to convince me that he needed to make a call. I hemmed and hawed, bending close to the screen, trying to muster the strength to say, “No.”

Suddenly I realized that King was in the mud room, growling and jumping at the back door.  Knowing he was there for me provided the courage I needed.  “My dog will not let you into my house,” I uttered with authority.  The young man turned and walked down the steps. I watched him walk away under the street lights, never stopping at another house.

I need only say the name of Jesus and my enemies will scatter. He is there always, His power at the ready for me to declare it. When I look back at that incident, I am sorry for the little girl who could not find the strength to stand up to a strange man and I shudder to think of the outcome had King not been there. My God, however, is always with me. I am His and He is mine. When I stand firm in His name, I am saved.

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Ephesians 6:13

It’s important for me to continually look forward to the life of grace Christ has provided for me. Do I believe that Christ has reconciled me to Himself? Do I believe that He makes all things new? Yes, and therefore, I am in Christ—the old has gone away and the new is here! I must honor what He has done, claim it and rejoice in it!

There is a story in Genesis about a man named Lot who lived with his family in a wicked city. Two angels visited the city and Lot hosted them in his home. The angels had come to warn Lot that the Lord was going to destroy the city and everyone in it. As the evil outside his door inflamed, the angels told Lot and his family to run far from the city to avoid its imminent destruction. They were told to keep running until they were in the mountains and not look back.

Lot’s family ran, but his wife looked back and was turned to a pillar of salt. Had she not let go of her past life? Did she fear the unknown future and long for the familiar? Whatever the reason, she lingered and did not claim the new life she had been gifted. She was left there in her deadly indecision, forever stuck between a place of promise and a past of fire and brimstone.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them.  2 Corinthians 5:17-19

Rejoice in the Lord, O you righteous! For praise from the upright is beautiful. Praise the Lord with the harp; Make melody to Him with an instrument of ten strings. Sing to Him a new song; play skillfully with a shout of joy. Psalm 33:1-3

I love the book of Psalms; it was the first book of the Bible that captured me. These poetic songs of thanksgiving, lament, wisdom and praise affirm God’s majesty and attune my spirit to hearing Him in each moment.

I had many beautiful moments and hours on my walks with the Lord. So many, it was hard to believe that these were the very parks I had walked for years, never experiencing anything like the wonderment of walking those same paths with God.  I had walked through creation, but not side-by-side with the Creator.

My life can display this distinction, too. I can exist, endure and survive each day or I can acknowledge, honor and praise God with the moments in it. Is there anything more essential than dwelling in these beautiful moments with God?  It is vital to my relationship with Him, and my spiritual wellbeing.  Time spent rapt in God’s presence is time spent beautifully.

One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the LORD And to meditate in His temple. Psalm 27:4

“Let Go and Let God” can be a powerful slogan for those who are trying to get out from under an affliction or the desire to control something or someone uncontrollable. I’ve used it many times, trying to be free of a frustrating situation. I ask God to come, take the problem from my grip, and heal it in only the way He can. Then I sit, hands in my lap, head down, breathing out slowly and back in slowly, accepting and reclaiming my powerless state.

Powerless. The word may bring panic at first when I am under the illusion that it is I who needs to fix everything.  My powerlessness, however, is ultimately beautiful, reminding me of God’s powerful presence, His infinite power, His perfect care for me and my loved ones. I cannot do it, but He can. God is the One from whom all power comes. He is the fount.

Omnipotent. This is the word that singularly applies to God, no one and nothing else. He is all-powerful, He can do all things. He is the ultimate source of love, healing, reconciliation, peace, strength and all things good.  To Him I offer my powerlessness.

When I come to humility, surrender, acceptance and admit that I am powerless, that I am not the source of answers and miracles, I turn to the One who is. He hears my prayers. He moves in my life and in me and shows me His power in all things that He, and He alone, be glorified.

And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.  2 Corinthians 12:9-10

The first story I wrote was about a young girl whose rowboat had crashed upon the shore of an island. She walked the island asking the animals for help to get home. Naturally, there was a wise owl and a large tortoise who carried her when her feet hurt. There were beavers who cut down the trees for her raft and monkeys who tied the wood together. Finally, a bird guided her harrowing escape across the sea.

I wanted to be a writer. I didn’t know how to make it happen, but I knew I was to write. In college, the only compliment I received from a professor was in a writing class. She asked me why I wasn’t in the school of journalism. I said I didn’t know, but I think I was afraid. I kept writing, though, because God had put it in me and it felt right and good. Later, I had a family and it felt right and good to be a full-time mom. I kept writing, though, because I loved it.

God has put seeds in me, of talent, of love, of faith. These things I can feel deeply and have always known, somewhere within myself. He intends for these gifts to reach out and beyond me too, for His glory. I want to embrace and nurture what God has started in me.  When I do, God will bless it to blossom.

In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.  Philippians 1:4-6

More than once on my walks, I encountered deer at a time when I was feeling uneasy, worried or distressed. I might be walking along, staring at the ground, hands tight, my mind gnawing and then a sound would make me look up into a woods. For a few moments, my eyes were upon a deer, while my mind saw nothing but brush. Like walking with the Creator of the universe, while feeling angst.

The deer always stood very still and stared directly at me, just like those fake ones people put in their yard. I would stop and stare back, maybe say a quiet “hello” and tell them how exquisite they are. Or smile, breathe and take in their very presence.

The life force of a deer is like an Olympic sprinter at the blocks. Beautiful, motionless and mute, they are teeming with life, an essence so vital and raw, that with a swoosh of a white tail, it bursts and drives them off in an instant to slip back to their secret places. The messengers gone, my feet would begin to walk again. My hands were loosened, my mind clear. My arms might swing, sweet peace sliding through and around them, bolstering me with lightness.

God shows Himself in His creation in gifts of gentleness and compassion. They are His provision of peace for me to behold. I don’t ever have to endure fear while walking with my Creator.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.  John 14:27

Recently my oldest friend came to visit with two of her children. She’s known me since I was wee. We like to laugh about our childhood adventures and unlikely pairing—Steph is fearless. She told her daughters, “Jennie knew all the houses where dogs lived in town. She’d say, ‘No, we can’t go that way! There’s a big dog behind that fence!’” True, and still true. Though my walks with God through the dog park did diminish my fearful reactions to strange dogs, I still prefer to avoid them when possible.

Fear may keep me from adventure and fun, but more importantly, it can keep me from the pleasures, gifts, revelation, growth and increase God wants to give me. There are times when God works in my life mysteriously and quietly, but most of the time I must be willing to step forward and answer His call. I must be unafraid to listen for His voice and then I must have the faith and boldness to move.

Sometimes if Steph’s ideas were a little too risky, she needed my counterbalance. We’ve decided that perhaps our personalities were a good mix of eagerness and pause. But in my relationship with God, there need only be eagerness. When I know He is moving in me, I need only go. There is nothing to fear, no reason to doubt. Confidence and trust in Him brings blessings to me.

The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? Psalm 27:1

When I was young I had a German Shepherd named King. A retired trained guard dog, he was seven when he came to live with us. One summer down at the farm, I wandered into the thick woods, we called “The Bear Swamp,” behind our field. King was at my side. There were a few favorite places I liked to visit:  the huge beech tree carved with my great-grandfather’s nickname—Hoopie, the four downed trees that marked a clearing where the sun came through, and the ditch that ran from our property, cutting far into the woods. At some point this day, I became disoriented, lost in the dark, shady trees and began to feel panic. Then I remembered who was with me.

I didn’t know if King knew the word “home” but I tried it anyway. Go home, King! The dog sprung into action, turned on a dime and made a beeline home. I ran to keep up, though I knew he wouldn’t leave me there. Since the day we got King, it was clear that he assumed the job of my protector and he never once failed to do just that.

When I am lost, I call to God, my King. My words may be simple.  I do not know how He will respond, but I ask. He responds, always.  He begins to show me the path He has prepared for me. I will watch to see where He leads, I will run behind Him eagerly with assurance, and I will arrive at the place that is pleasing in His sight.

The LORD is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”  Deuteronomy 31:8