Today I saw the sun through a rabbit’s ears. Yesterday a spotted fawn crossed my trail. There is now an expectation at the park for all good things. Walking with God, I can glimpse the world through His supremacy and grace, all, including the adverse, perceived in his light.

My walks have taught me to hold this wherever I go and when I do, which is more and more often, I find God. And God is good, He exceeds expectations, always. Not every day will be bunny ears and spotted fawns but I ask that He show me His good things, in Jesus’ name.

Sometimes I am around people who don’t practice this. Sometimes I am the one not practicing this. In either case, I try to let it go. Negative talk, whosever it is, is not to stay in my mind or ears. Lord wash it away, Your Truth to stay. 

On the morning after my son entered rehab, I was reeling in pain, relieved that he was getting help but frightened of what others would say. That freezing morning in January, I drove my youngest to school and noticed a couple of people staring as I went by.  They must be talking about this already, I cringed. On the way back, two ladies, huddled together on a corner, looked up and pointed. I rushed home to hide and lick my wounds. Stepping out onto my driveway, I saw a large paper cup frozen to the top of my van. I burst into laughter at my delusion, instantly freed from care of what others thought or said. That cup was a wonderful gift from my Comforter. He has the final say. I listen for His voice over all others and wait for His Light to touch my ears.

These people are grumblers and faultfinders; they follow their own evil desires; they boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage. Jude 1:16

Imagine the flowers in God’s heavenly garden. Always open, ever receiving and available, eternally reaching high. In His presence, there is nothing to wilt over, no reason to hang low. They drink eagerly of His light and water and feast on His voice, blossoming in divine fullness to His glory. This is how I imagine God’s garden: bursting in color and bustling in service.

God’s garden stays green in His heavenly realm, whetted forever anew in Him and I must do the same. To stay open to His Holy Spirit and equipped for His work, I study His Word and listen for His voice. He renews my spirit and opens me further in love when I stay close to Him. His food and water is all I need and I flourish endlessly as I take it. In a way, God’s children are like flowers in His garden, planted for His pleasure, cultivated to declare His majesty and spread the Word to others who will bloom and do the same. 

Hebrews 10:23 says, Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. 

God plants believers in the richest soil so they stand unwavering ready to share God’s love and grace. They become only lovelier in the doing, for there is an intimate blessing in the Trinity as one works out her salvation. She who opens herself to others with God’s love is one of His most fragrant flowers.

Like newborn babies, crave spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tested that the Lord is good. 1 Peter 2:2-3

 

I walked through quite a few spiderwebs this year. I like to leave the pavement and meander down by the lake where the path is uneven and overgrown with roots and bushes and other living things. Lord Byron said, “There is a pleasure in the pathless woods, there is a rapture on the lonely shore…” There is also a spider in the trees that spins large webs. 

Spiders. I know they are there, I know they spin webs and still I tread in their territory and end up flailing and griping in their sticky traps. It is highly uncomfortable to be in the web of a spider. For one, I don’t belong there, they are spun for spiders and bugs, not humans. No doubt bugs aren’t happy in them either, but this is their lot. 

The webs of the enemy are spun for me, but should not entrap me either. That even one moment of my life might be snatched from its proper place with Jesus calls me to vigilance. It isn’t my lot in life to flop from web to web fighting for my life or my dignity or my soul. Jesus defeated the enemy, it is my portion and my privilege to walk closely with Him on the path He forged. So I walk in discernment, following closely in His steps, free from entanglement and distress.

I began to carry a big stick in the woods and waved it before me as I followed Him to the pleasure and rapture I sought on the banks. God calls me to behold Him and walk in wisdom.

Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil he’s not seen God.     3 John 1:11

In the gospels of Matthew, Mark and Luke is the parable of the sower which Jesus told to a large crowd of followers. He spoke of a farmer sowing seed and that some of the seed fell and was eaten by birds. Some fell on rocky ground and couldn’t produce good roots. Some grew alongside of thorns and were eventually crowded and choked, and some seed fell on good ground and grew well, producing a good yield.

Jesus was referring to the Word of God being sown into the hearts of people. In some, the Word is stolen from them before it can take root; in some the soil is so shallow and stoney that the seed sprouts but cannot sustain growth; in some the seed takes root and grows but is surrounded by things that strangle and kill it before it can bloom and produce a harvest. Finally, some seed is planted well and is nourished and flourishes.

As I examine this parable in the context of my life, I see that by the grace of God, I am not the first and not the second, but when it comes to the third, being choked by the things of the world, I must be a conscientious gardener. There have been lush seasons of my life when I did not tend to the seed nor cut back the thorns that would threaten it. I let my plot grow wild with indulgence, sin and neglect and ignored the precious seed that the farmer had sown in me.

Without that seed of God’s grace, without His Word to water my spirit, I shrivel and waste.  Let me protect His gift, mature in the ways of God, study His Word, flower and seed

The seed that fell among thorns stands for those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by life’s worries, riches and pleasures, and they do not mature.  Luke 8:14

 

 

One morning the lake was especially peaceful. I paddled out to the middle and stopped, giving audience to the splendor. There was nowhere to go and everywhere to be. I wanted to drift in the rising steam, aim for the dark banks and dive into the middle all at once, yet I felt the fullness of it all in my place with the Creator. Resting my oar, I came to balance in the tranquility. Doing nothing at all I gained the entirety, the sun, the lake, the mist and the sky, doubled even, on the mirror of the water.

It was then, when I stopped and surrendered, that I noticed the wind, so gently moving me on the glassy water. And where would it take me? I didn’t care. When I rest in God’s arms, I have buoyant expectation of being delivered to a new place. Physically or spiritually, I will be delivered. 

I remember sleeping snugly in the back seat of my father’s Chevelle when my family traveled home from my grandparents late at night. Vaguely aware of the hum of the road, my sister’s slumbering form next to me, my parents’ low voices, I slept like a satiated bear cub in my warm cave. I dwelled in perfect, innocent trust in my parents’ care. I never wanted the ride to end.  

The stops became frequent, the accelerations slower. Finally the steep incline of the driveway, tugged me from sleep. It was time to go in, held securely in my father’s arms.

But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.  Titus  3:4-7

 

An excellent spirit is within me, I take it wherever I go. It is the Holy Spirit given to me by God to grow His kingdom, love His people and bring Him to the world. Someone carries Him to me, in my case, my grandmother, and then I carry Him to others. 

It is good to remember this in all things.  The fact is, I leave a little bit of me wherever I go, with whomever I meet. It should be the part that speaks of God and His saving grace. 

How then shall they call on Him in whom they have not believed? And how shall they believe in Him of whom they have not heard? And how shall they hear without a preacher? And how shall they preach unless they are sent? As it is written: “How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the gospel of peace, Who bring glad tidings of good things!” Romans 10:14-15

One afternoon my sister and I went to lunch in Philadelphia. I had just had an eye exam after an accident and was feeling rather fragile. In front of the restaurant was a table of happy people making paper flowers. They called to us as we approached, “Here! Choose a flower pin for yourself! They’re free!” They were all so pretty. I finally chose an orange one, she chose blue. A simple paper flower. I wore mine on my shirt for the rest of the day and felt blessed and special. Imagine wearing the Spirit I carry out into the world like a beautiful flower on my shirt! How beautiful it is to bring glad tidings of good things!

Then this Daniel was preferred above the presidents and princes, because an excellent spirit was in him; and the king thought to set him over the whole realm. Daniel 6:3

I have the tendency to shift into neutral and idle. I have noticed that some people explode out of the blocks when they meet with a challenge, sometimes it seems, without even giving their direction a second thought. I have done this as well, but too often I crouch and stare at the expanse, waiting.

Lingering isn’t the same as waiting on God. Waiting in His presence is actively surrendering a situation to God and, in the meantime, moving forward in a direction in keeping with His will. Lingering evokes feelings of the past, wishes for something different, stubbornly waiting for my own way to somehow materialize. 

When I linger long, I find nothing. I stand abandoned in a place that no longer exists—the past, the abyss of my wishing. I strand myself, refusing connections and choices.  What’s more, this place is a mirage, it’s untrue. God is behind me, tapping my shoulder. Turn around, child, I will show you the way.

When I find myself at the end of the road, it’s because I have driven myself there and it is no place to set up camp. Nothing good comes down that road, I must turn and begin to walk and talk to God and when I do, He will come alongside and take my arm. He waits on my return

Give careful thought to your ways. You have planted much, but harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it. Haggai 1:5-6

 

 

Hold fast to the cross.

Christian talk can sound flat sometimes. To a person who doesn’t know what was accomplished on the cross, “holding fast” to it must sound trite. To even a Christian who has not yet fathomed the power that Jesus transferred to her by His sacrifice and resurrection, “the cross” may be abstract and abstruse. If I don’t understand the power in the cross, I stand powerless in the face of the enemy. He approaches. He is coming, but God has provided me with the authority to throw him down where he belongs. 

I remember being bullied in second grade. There was a boy who followed me around the playground kicking my legs and calling me “four-eyes”.  I must have complained about him a lot because one day my mother told me to stand up to him and, if necessary, kick him back. Something happened inside me when I knew that I could act in my own defense and with the authority of my mother. Even though it was just little me against the big boy on that playground, I wasn’t vulnerable any longer. I had my mom’s say-so. 

That boy was no devil and my mom is not my holy Lord God Almighty, but I do remember that lesson: I am not in this life to be victimized, I am loved and I am protected. My parents and my Father God will not leave me defenseless. I have authority to cast off the one who offends and violates in hatred for God and His creation. 

Hold fast to the authority of the cross

 For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age.  Titus 2:11-12

 

There is a certain curve in the path where, still when I pass, I can tap into the anguish and grief I bore on my first walks. It lies between the soccer fields and the dog park and floods deeply with storms and melting snow. I cried there too, because it is a lonely path where no one could hear, like litterers who dump their loads on deserted roads where no one can see their sin. 

I cannot imagine Christ’s agony on the cross, carrying the sins, diseases and anguishes of all of His children. Jesus was a man. I am a woman. I can’t carry all of my sorrows, so God allowed Jesus to be in desolation, wholly plunged into the world’s misery so I do not have to even try. 

As a mom, I have carried a lot. I carry groceries to my kitchen, I carried my babies to their cribs, I carry clothes to be washed, I carry clutter to its home.  “Carrying” has an endpoint, a destination. God does not want me to carry anything forever. He does that, He carries even me. While carried my children for many years, there did come a time when I could no longer lift them. But God holds me forever. My sins were His burden which He received on the cross. My soul is His love which He carries with grace and mercy. 

I mustn’t wade in the pool of my sorrows. God carries me through to the place of His love, mercy and grace

And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops or blood falling to the ground. Luke 22:44

 

I believe that God’s beams reach out to all the earth, His people, His entire Creation. And I believe that Creation longs for those beams and moves in a direction to align with the blessing inherent in them.

 Along the way it may meet with interference. An imposter extends itself before this tendril of a soul, and promises to satisfy its yearning. Stretching and reaching for the beam, the tendril is charmed in the shadow of the lie. It abandons the promise of God and begins hoping that the lie will suffice. It never will. 

Of course, bad things ultimately unfold. The beam is gone and vine collects itself heavily on that limb for warmth. The limb isn’t a vital limb after all, but a dead twig now cracking under the weight of the desperately invested vine. Now the vine fears moving again at all.  

Move again toward God or collapse.

There are the beams—they were within the vine’s reach all along. But what will hold the weight of its mistake? The Son. The Source. It gathers the pile and holds it while the vine strengthens in those pure, golden rays.

That is how I rise. That is how I grow in Christ. That is how I am saved. Not settling for the things that pretend to be my saving place, but patiently reaching and praying for His saving grace.

The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.        Numbers 6:24-26