Here is what I know about God.  He can do anything and everything.  Here is what I know about me.  Sometimes I want a miracle.   There was a time I prayed for a miracle for seven years, but God just didn’t seem to be working on it.  What I found at the end of those seven years was that He was working on me.  Then I received my miracle.

When I believe my prayers align perfectly with God’s will and yet nothing seems to be happening, I ask myself a question:  Is there something you believe God wants you to do in this situation?  Often the answer to my question pops right into my head.  Yes, of course, he’d want me to do this or that!  But I don’t want to!  Or, that’s impossible!  Or, it would be so much easier for everyone if God just provided that miracle!  Easy answers don’t provide spiritual growth.  God wants me to grow in His love.

My Father is so good.  He knows how important it is for me to become eager to do His will.  When I humble myself and act in accordance to His guidance, He blesses my effort.  When I am walking alongside Him, my hand in His, my trust in Him and my life given to Him, I am like a loving child abiding with her parents, longing to please them.  And she is blessed even more.

But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.        James 1:23-25

I like being alone.  On these walks I have the best of both worlds—alone and with God.  Isn’t it funny that some would rather be surrounded by a gaggle of humans than have quiet moments with the Almighty God of the Universe?  

When I spend time with God, He warms me in His radiance.   My every cell is filled by His presence, replete with a holy Yes!  I focus on God’s love and magnificence instead of dwelling on the things I feel are missing from my life.  And I am blessed.  I am missing nothing.  Everything is here.

Loneliness can feel like I am being left out of important relationships, but there is none as important as my relationship with God.  And God’s presence can reach me anywhere! Like filaments of golden lifelines shining through a dark woods, God’s love finds me and in that divine moment nothing else matters.  

I am with you always, even to the end of the age. Matthew 28:20

I go through lags of depression that steal my essence. Chaotic upheaval, like cups of salty water, can choke my throat and drown my breath.  I’ve gotten lost in seasons of darkness and somehow abandoned my relationship with God.  I don’t stop loving Him or believing in all that He is.  I just fall away like a petal off a flower, watching my source grow blurry as I silently drop, unable to hold on to that intimate, vital love.

I must stay near to my Father through the worst times. I know that when I crawl into His healing arms He will provide a single, gentle step. If I take His offer, He will provide another.  Along the way, I must be honest, painfully so, about my thoughts and feelings.  I will share with God every detail of hurt, the shame of my sins, each scorching coal of anger, the bruising emotion. 

He already knows the things I will tell Him, of course.  The vital part is my willingness to share them with Him. When I reach out and pass the exact nature of my distress to my Father, my hand touches His and it is no longer my suffering, but ours.

I surrender the ache, the fear, the torment.  God receives it.  I will never know how or when His cure will find me.  I just know that it will. God’s plan for me is always a sweet return to His love, peace and strength.  It begins here and now. I know there will come a day when I am filled again. 

Even when I walk through the dark valley of death, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me.   Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.  Psalm 23:1-4

God’s words are precious.  He speaks to me words of truth that heal my soul like nothing else can.  Sometimes I get diverted and spend a lot of time listening to what those around me say.  I begin to absorb their opinions, their beliefs, their plans, their desires, their expectations, their frustrations.  When I attune my ears to others’ voices, I can become confused and lose myself, the extraordinary person God made me to be.  I fail to know God fully when I don’t embrace and honor His word before all others. 

Coming to know God is the most important thing I can do in my life.  I will seek Him.  I will attune my ears to His word and my mind to His truth.  

 Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.          Galations 1:10

How can I understand just how good God is and how perfectly He loves me? I read this in the Bible, I know it to be true, God’s Truth. Today I understood that I may be challenged, that God may lead me to places I fear to go.  Are you ready for all that I have for you?  Are you willing to trust Me on our journey?  Will you go wherever I lead you?

I have trusted Him in times of fear and trouble, when I had nowhere else to turn, after trying to handle the impossible myself. But trust in God must come first, not last. Trust in God is not only the answer but the aim. He says that I am never lost when I walk at His side.  My own strength has limits, it can falter and fail me. God does not falter. He never fails me. God is all-powerful. I can rely on Him. I will go wherever He leads me.

Be strong and courageous; do not be frightened or dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.  Joshua 1:9

I walked to the pond today and three koi swam toward me from the middle.  Yellow-gold, orangey red and silvery white.  I smiled.  The Father, Son and the Holy Spirit.  We are here.  We will be with you always.

There is a God who loves me.  Jesus sacrificed Himself to save me.   The Holy Spirit dwells in me and guides me.  God Is and He will never leave me.  He will never fail to listen and speak to me because He loves me.  I am His child.  He is waiting for me to come to Him for everything.  For anything.  I am filled with joy and anticipation for a year of walking with God!

So he set off and went to his father.  But while he was still far off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion; he ran and put his arms around him and kissed him. Luke 15:20

One day the Creator of the Universe called me to the park.  A gentle finger tapping my shoulder over and over, He beckoned me to put down my work and go.  So I did.

I started in my usual way.  For years I had been walking at the park, striding purposefully to the loud music in my headphones, seeking exercise, accomplishment, escape.  This day, after a song or two, I felt a prompting to turn off the music, put away the devices and open myself to God.  Speak to Him.  Listen for Him.

The park changed this August afternoon. I began to see Him everywhere. Birdsongs colored the trees. Holy Spirit glowed within me.  I whispered to God an unbridled rush of thoughts, pleadings, fears, and concerns.  The empty paths along the woods invited me to share my full voice with the expanse and I did, while God captured every word, as a friend keeping pace. He was there.  He had been with me all along.

Why had I never noticed? I had been to this park hundreds of times but never strolling and delighting in God.  No, I had been trying to reach for peace with strides of exertion and only exhausted myself in the effort.  God offered to refresh me with His presence.  On this day, the voice within me said, “I will be walking with you.”  So I returned to walk with God every single day.  

Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you. James 4:8